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Forty Terrible Mistakes You Can Make Making Love With A Woman

If you thought the route to sexual bliss was simple, look at this list of sexual blunders made by men when they're enjoying sex. If any of them seem familiar, you need to sharpen up on your bedroom etiquette!

1) Heading for her vulva, clitoris or breasts

A woman is more likely to be irritated than sexually aroused when a man goes for her breasts and vulva after a bit of kissing. Be sensitive and touch her sexual areas only when she's already aroused. If you go for her breasts when you start foreplay and twiddle her nipples like you're tuning a radio station, you're not going to get a very good reception.

2) Not knowing how to kiss like a romantic

Passionate kissing is an art form which eases a couple into the main part of sex and cultivates intimacy. Learn how to kiss your woman, and do it well. That doesn't include sticking your tongue in her mouth and wiggling it around madly.

3) Not respecting her erogenous zones

Men like to have a firm touch applied to their dick. But if you approach her clitoris with the same as you apply to your penis when you're treating yourself to a quick wank, she's likely to howl with pain - and then she'll probably kick you out of bed. The clitoris has twice as many nerves as the penis, so it's very sensitive. Treat it accordingly.

4) Not stroking her body

A woman's biggest sex organ is her mind. The next biggest is her skin. If you were thinking of anything else, think again. For a woman, sex is all about connection. And that includes skin to skin connection. An hour spent massaging her will arouse her to her need for sex and almost certainly guarantee she has an orgasm one way or another. Make sure you focus on putting some sexual energy into your fingers while you stroke. That means not thinking distractedly about the baseball game while you're oiling her up.

5) Locking onto her nipples like a suckling child

Tempting though it may be to suck on her breasts, she's not going to thank you for reminding her of the last time a teething child bit into her nipple. Kiss all around her breasts and gently work towards her nipple, licking it with your tongue and maybe carefully sucking it between your lips when she's really aroused. If she likes what you're doing, you'll know by her moans of pleasure.

6) Biting or blowing on her earlobe because you think it's sexy

Very few women seem to find this exciting. Your time would be better spent searching out her sensitive zones elsewhere.

7) Leaving a kiss bite on her neck

If you're over the age of consent, this is a no-no. If you need to know why, you're obviously under age and you shouldn't be having sex.

8) Not shaving before sex

Think what it was like the last time you gave oral sex to a woman with a few days' stubble around her vulva. Now imagine that brushing back and forth on your face in the mad throes of passionate kissing. Enough said?

9) Not washing your pits and bits before you make love

Even if you just have what the French call a tart's wash, make sure you're a smell-free zone when you enter the bedroom. (In case you need to know - the male equivalent is washing your penis, balls, ass, and armpits.)

10) Forgetting that romance starts a long time before lovemaking

No woman wants to be taken for granted. If you touch her lovingly all day, show how much you love her, and take the trouble to make sure she knows you're thinking of her, she'll be ready to melt into your arms in the evening. Leaving loving little billets-douxwhere she'll find them is also a good idea. But make sure they are romantic!

11) Inserting a finger before she's ready

Yes, we know you're a man, and we know you're obsessed with penetration. But hold on. Take your time, let events move at their own pace, and only pluck the fruit when you know it's really ripe and dripping juice. While men forget that women like penetration just as much as men (which is just as well, when you think how much men like to stick things up a woman), she'll only want this when she's aroused enough to enjoy it. So as you finger her clit, surreptitiously check out her cunt. If it's moist and open, she may well be receptive to a finger on her G-spot. Start gently and apply a firmer touch as you go. If you don't know what the G-spot is, go check it out on Google.

12) Going straight to her clitoris during cunnilingus or masturbation

Most women just find this irritating - and very uncomfortable too, if the clit isn't aroused and slippery. Work from around her labia, the lips of her vulva, towards the clitoris as she gets more aroused. Even then, a subtle touch along the shaft of her clitoris around to the side of the clitoral head may be better for her.

3) Stopping when she wants you to keep going till she comes

If she's almost at orgasm she certainly won't want you to stop whatever you're doing, whether it's with your cock, your fingers or your tongue. Since cunnilingus is hard on the tongue, we suggest you make sure your fingers are ready to take over if you get a bad case of lock jaw. If she's not saying much, she may be lying there silent because she's got lost in her excitement, not because you're licking ineffectively at her clit. But then again, how would you know? She may be so excited by what you're doing that she shows it by pressing her vulva more firmly against your mouth or fingers, in which case carry on with your stimulation. If she gives off an aura that she'd rather be cooking the dinner, you need to think of something else. Like asking her what she wants, maybe?

14) Undressing her inelegantly

Listen up guys: you don't have to take her bra off with one hand blindfold in the dark while you kiss her. Indeed, she might well appreciate it more if you let her disrobe. Nothing about an underwear fumble is funny, especially if it interrupts the romance. Let her take off anything you don't know about and when you do help, make it look like you're delicately removing her garments rather than pulling at her clothes like you can't wait to fuck her - even if you that's true.

15) Looking like a clown in the bedroom

Nothing is more pathetic to a woman than a man wearing his underpants and socks. Why this should be so remains a mystery, since it seems so natural to a man to undress like that. However, if you don't want her to laugh, take off your socks first.

16) Expecting her to shave for you

Yes, we know you like the smooth look around her vulva, but if she's not into shaving, don't put pressure on her to smooth it out for you. There are few things less comfortable than itchy stubble in the groin. If you want to see more and have easier access to her pussy, ask her to lightly trim the hair.

17) Entering her without asking her first

Such a bizarre idea! And yet so nice - occasionally, at least - to be romantic and ask "May I enter you?" This can be a very sexy and loving thing to do if you're looking deep into her eyes. Needless to say, that's most likely to happen in the man on top position, which, by the way, remains everyone's most popular position for sex. And then again, sometimes you can just sense the moment for penetration - but don't let your judgment be affected by how much you want to get your penis inside her. Yes, we know it feels very nice. But be a man - and make sure she's ready first.

18) Pecking away around her vagina with your penis if you can't get in

This will turn her off at once - guaranteed. If you can't find the way in (it happens) on your own, tell her what's going on and ask her to guide your penis in. There's no shame in that, but acting like a klutz can ruin sex for you both. And anyway, it'll be quicker if she just puts it in for you.

19) Pumping away without regard for her pleasure

Now you're in! Hurrah! But whatcha gonna do next? Pump away heartily till you ejaculate? Bad idea.....surely you'll want to show a certain consideration for her pleasure? So make sure you start with slow and shallow thrusts. When you make love, she'll like it best if you act masculine and strong: be confident, know what you're doing, be considerate and gentle at first, and work up to harder and more vigorous thrusts if she makes it clear that's what she wants (as in "oh, yes, fuck me harder!").

20) Expecting her to willingly offer her bottom to you when you want rear entry sex

It's a male thing, the desire for rear entry sex. Mostly. Then again, women sometimes get the urge for rampant, primal sex too. In between, you might get it on your birthday, if you're lucky. And if you do persuade her to indulge you, don't make the mistake of slapping her rump like you're spurring her on to buck harder and faster.

21) Thrusting too hard when you have a big penis

If you happen to have a big penis, restrain yourself as you thrust, or you might hear her shriek as you hit her cervix. This will not, probably, be a shriek of delight. It may, however, signal the end of your pleasure for the moment.

22) Premature ejaculation is not the mark of a good lover

Very few men have the endurance that allows them to really please a woman who enjoys vaginal intercourse and G-spot stimulation. You can improve your staying-power with self help exercises, but if you just can't be bothered, at least have the decency to keep going for at least long enough to give her some pleasure. Do some research on Google for "end premature ejaculation".

23) Not coming at all - retarded ejaculation

Delayed ejaculation is not the gift of the gods that you might think. She won't see it as any kind of blessing, either, when her vagina is bone dry, she's bored out of her mind and you still aren't anywhere near ejaculating. So if you are one of the ten percent of men who have trouble ejaculating, go see a sexual therapist! The sooner you get treated, the sooner she'll be able to enjoy making love with you and stop having plenty of time to think about the exact shade of paint to put on the bedroom ceiling.

24) Losing your hard-on when you put the condom on

This is very common, so it's back to Google for you. Try a search on "losing erection when putting on a condom" and see if there are any tips to keep your erection.

25) Not being willing to go down on her when she wants oral pleasure

I haven't yet met a man who didn't like the idea of going down on a woman, so any reservations must be about her smell or taste. If she's a bit well, fishy, then suggest a bath as part of foreplay. If all you're interested in is getting her to suck your cock and you won't do the same in return, reading these tips isn't going to help you much anyway.

26) Failing to ensure her pleasure if you have premature ejaculation

By the way, {{{you should make sure that your woman has an orgasm before you do|women come first